Yes, I'm lost in space and I am stuck in the mud. There is no day (Saturdays included!) my work phone doesn't ring. There is no other way but to answer it. Screw up your holidays, little naive darling and get over it. Then figure out how to get out from that mud. Remember you are good at it. You did it already more than once. You are Phoenix. You rise from your own ashes born and reborn again into a New Life and fresh new Adventure into Unknown with no fear whatsoever. First make peace with what it is than figure out how to get out of it. Just don't wait till you hit the very bottom. No, not again. Not this time.
(I am so tired. )
